Sunday, 13 February 2011

Mentaliti kita

Saya selalu dipandang pelik oleh masyarakat Melayu kerana mempunyai nama "Foo". Tetapi saya ni membesar dalam masyarakat melayu juga. Fasih berkata-kata bahasa Melayu walaupun nama "Foo".

Malah lebih pelik kalau ade orang-orang Melayu, yang tahu pasal nama saya dan nampak saya solat di masjid.

Lagi pelik, ada sesetengah orang yang tidak senang melihat saya bergaul dalam masyarakat Melayu.

Pernah dulu dituduh orang mcm saya ni akan menjatuhkan ketuanan Melayu sebab saya ni sebenarnya orang cina bertaraf bumiputera.

Kadang-kadang lebih pelik apabila ade juga yang extremis yang menolak saya terus sebagai kawan sebab saya ni 'separuh' cina.

Ade juga yang agak pelik apabila tidak senang sekiranya saya berdekatan.

Yang paling pelik, saya ni tiada bangsa...

Sedih melihat bangsaku ini tidak membangunkan mentaliti sendiri. Dunia ni bukan untuk orang Melayu sahaja. Islam itu bukan untuk orang Melayu sahaja.

Pernah ku terfikir jika orang-orang sebegini, biar dia dicampak ke benua lain, dan bukalah mata itu. Melayu bukannya satu-satu bangsa di dunia ini. Melayu bukanlah Tuan bagi dunia ini.

Sedih membesar dalam keadaan sebegini. Seumur hidup saya, dipandang serong sesetengah masyarakat Melayu yang kononnya mereka adalah yang terhebat. Saya ini bangsa Melayu kelas dua sbb berdarah campur.

Satu hari nanti, mungkin bukan dalam tempoh masa hidup saya.....saya harap orang Melayu sedar akan mentaliti mereka yang mengongkong mereka selama ini. Jadilah orang yang hebat di dunia ini tapi janganlah menggadai integriti bangsa dan agama Islam itu sendiri.


"Saya rakyat Malaysia"

Thursday, 10 February 2011


Now is a pharmacology lecture. But i'm sitting at the back slacking my ass off! Luckily, there's recap! Ehehe! You have to say thank technology for this! Thank you Recap!


It's getting really depressing nowadays. With work not progressing, and with lots of other troubles in mind, I feel I can't concentrate much with my studies. And I cant concentrate in lectures as well.

But I do understand whatever the lecturer were trying to teach. Just that I don't find the energy to write down notes even when it's early in the morning.

I am in a depressed state now. I'm not sure how to pop out of this state. But I better find a way to do so fast. Another assignment is coming soon...

I need to clear my mind. I hope I could have a break from all this for a while.

Sooner or later, I'll have to face this. Might as well face it now rather than running away from it..

Write more soon.



Tuesday, 8 February 2011


Nowadays, the very word 'lecture' invoke a surge of laziness in me! The technology of Recap made me feel like it's pointless to go to a lecture. But still, Recap isn't as good as it gets in the real deal.

Probably some of you wonder what is a Recap?

Well, most universities have this but probably by a different name. Recap is this recording system that records the slides of the presentation that the lecturer presents and the voice of the lecturer as well. It's a great technology if you wanna listen back to any difficult ideas that the lecturers were trying to convey. Or if you skipped class...

Skipping class eyh? Should I or should I not? ;)

I wonder...

It's been ages since I've last seen my blog! Feels like a grown man looking over his childhood diary when I read back my posts. Those were the days when I have plenty of time in the world to write. But now, reality strikes. Amazingly how fast time passes me by. It seems like yesterday, the cold chilly air of Newcastle filled my lungs as I first step foot outside of the Newcastle International Airport. Now it's my second semester of my first year.

I have so much to say but so little time.

I'm not sure why I feel like I wanna blog again. Probably because there's this voice in my head that narrates almost anything that I do. Just like life writing about itself. I sometimes find myself sitting alone in the bus, looking out in the window to the clear blue sky, and I wonder.

I've reached so far...but there's more to reach out for.

The memoirs of my life, encrypted in my head starts to unravel itself. Flashes of memories starts to appear. One by one starts to be clear. The more I ponder, the weirder it gets.

Sometimes, when I walk through the plain field of grass, I started to wonder again. As the chilly wind sweeps on my face, stroking my hair back and forth, like a mother lovingly cherishing her child, I wonder...

I wonder when will it stop? But then again, every ending is a new beginning...