Another Performance....

Well, yesterday I performed along with Leman, Afiq and together with Dawa in the Auditorium of Hospital Tunku Jaa'far Seremban.

I was given the role of playing guitar along with Leman and Afiq would be singing along with Dawa. Anyway, it's a nice performance(according to the audience)....I still think that the performance is rather funny.....Haha...

I laughed during the performance, with Leman (While playing Guitar!!!) .....Why is it funny????

Because I was trembling and so was Leman....

Not because we were nervous or what......Its because it was so cold....hahahaaa....My leg was shaking....Weird huh?

During the entire guitar solo, my fingers were shaking vigorously demanding warmth....I saw Leman's hand was also trembling.....

Probably a little bit nervous would also contribute to the involuntary movement but I was definitely calm... =D

Then, the was the other bands.....dikir barat and the final song which definitely an awe-inspiring performance....(As for mine, I dunno because I was not the audience)

I hope people didn't notice about my involuntary movements....Or mayb they thought I did it on purpose to look cool? I dunno....but sucks when its very cold because you have to focus but your mind is definitely thinking of something warm....

So, that sums up what I did in Hospital Tunku Jaafar....Another experience of playing guitar on stage...Too bad my electric guitar cannot be used....It would sure rock the hell out of the hall...!!

Next time mayb, If there's any chance....I would like to play instrumental songs along with Leman.... =)

For my father...

My brother and I was planning to go out and buy my father some gifts....We collected some money but its just a small sum...because we practically jobless.... =D

Nevertheless, I took out my savings (Not in bank one...In wallet one =D ) and my brother gave some money....

As we were discussing what to buy, my mum came along and gave a sum of money too. She gave the most actually =D

With a quite a large sum, we thought we can buy some good stuff for him.... My sister too want to pay her part when she return back here.....

So overall, we have close to a thousand =)

What to buy is the hardest question today.....

I wasn't sure about what my father would really like or appreciate because normally he's the one that buy gifts to us.

I realize that we didn't give him much of gifts during our entire time with him. Strange isn't it? The person that knows what you like most but we know nothing about what he wants.....I'm ashamed of myself...

My mum, baffled by our discussion, ended up asking my father what he wants for Father's day....Awwwww, spoiler...hehee... =D

My father said he don't want anything for Father's day......

And I realize one thing.....the best gift for Father's day or Mother's day, is our presence with them.....Its not about money, gifts, items, expensive goodies....Its always about us....

We are the most precious gift to our parents. Nothing can change that fact...

So, I call all of you, who are reading this post....Spend a minute to call your father, or at least sms him. The best is you are there to wish him Happy Father's Day...

What to buy for Father's day??

My gosh, its Father's day today....

I don't know what I want to buy......!! I was thinking of buying him an expensive pen, but I figured that he already have so many pens at his office....

What to buy??? =.=

Help?!?

Scary movie : Back to KMS

For all of you who didn't know, life in KMS is pretty much like a scary movie. Everything is weird about KMS....

First thing when you reach the hostel, you'll your stuff ransacked like got ghost searching for some cigarettes in your room. Pocong or mayb Toyol study chemistry Raymond Chang...Or Campbell Biology so that they can effectively haunt us by knowing what hormone is secreted when we are scared to death....

Then, the food...The food is equally as scary as the rooms....You'll find the DS "Makcik" like an evil witch with flying brooms....Flying in the DS making sure you don't spill your food, or take too many chickens from them....

Then, the classrooms....Its like a jail cell with a heater in the middle of a desert...Oh my God, its pratically an oven, and I think I can roast a whole chicken in the class....Forget chicken, a whole cow also can...

There we are, sitting in the classroom, just like kenny roger's chicken in the oven...waiting for customers to save us by ordering chicken stuff, so that we can get the hell out of there....

After classrooms, is the library....basically library is a meeting room, or should I say the Parliament of KMS....Everyone went there and simply opens their mouth.....If bad breath can be coloured green, the library would be known as the death gas chamber....

Well, then there is the homework....Every teacher thinks that we are only taking his/her subject(there are exceptions)....If the knowledge is a part of our body weight, we would be fat...I mean REAL FAT.....So many revisions has to be done.... =P

And best of all, EE.......Extended Essay is like making a new element from nothing...Creating an atom from scratch....Playing a guitar without any strings, driving a car without any tires, flying a plane without any wings, cycling a bike without bicycle paddles, Writing an essay without any pen, Lighting up a room without any source of light, and its like asking a cow to break dance....

Not forgetting IAs, World lit....TOK essay.....

Exam results....This is the scariest part...I think I gonna get low marks and points this time...I didn't prepare for the exam =P Mentally and physically....I guess I have to make a thick face to answer to my parents later on, when they asked about my results....

Well, that sums up about the opening sem.....Will I survive KMS? Only time will tell...

So pray for me....and pray for us in KMS to succeed, and I hope we can overcome the wall that has been keeping us prisoned.... ( I don't know crap what this means =P)



P/s : Cerita ini adalah rekaan semata-mata, tiada kena-mengena dengan sesiapapun mahupun yang hidup ataupun yang dah mati....Tapi pasal test tu betol.... =D

New look...

I like the new template...It calms me....So, what you guys think??

Another ramblings by me...

Helping people and getting help is a different matter from one another. One might think that the same concept of help applies but its a different thing. Same like your parents love to us and your love to your children. I know we might not have any experience on this one, but perhaps we have some idea of it.

Basically, it does not matter that people do not give the answer that you might expected. It's just a test, that perhaps only some would notice.

Anyway, if it were to be true that my level of thinking if further beyond ordinary people, I can't achieve that level without help from others as well. You see, we developed based on what we observed others, and what we experience by ourselves. There is no way that you achieve a certain level of thinking suddenly. Only miracles of God can do that.

We changed at the precipice, when we at a brink of destruction or a path....And that is make us mature enough to see the world is a tough place to live in....I would not say that I'm already mature, since maturity is very subjective and there is no scientific measurement for it. So how do you actually mature? By the presence of others....Their presence already liberate you from your child fantasy to the reality world. That is a fact that we cannot run from...

I feel I need help because I realise that no matter how tough you are, life gonna beat you down till you can't stand it anymore. Life is not about how much hits can you take, but it is about how much hits can you take, and keep moving forward.... I believe that, to keep moving forward, you need to get help....or at least have someone to watch over you. Because the fact is that we are actually ALONE.


P/s : This is actually a response to the comment on the previous post by Wan Joe aka BAGONG

Frustration...Whats wrong with me?

Frustrating isn't it? When you try so hard to gain something but in the end you realise that there's nothing in it. When you try so hard to solve a problem and in the end the problem is you. I've talked so much about helping people but in the end, I'm the one who needs help. No one knows what my problem is. Even me....

I figured, if I would help people, their problems would open my eyes to my own problem. But I find there's nothing close to an answer.

Why bother?? Why bother to find an answer that isn't there?? Why bother to help others when you can't help yourself?? Why bother to even think of helping people??

I reckoned that no one should put themselves into a position where they would be stuck. But now, I am....I can't get unstuck...

So what should I do?? Should I give up now?? I have no idea... Some say the best thing to do is do nothing....But even some said doing nothing also brings something, a consequence.

I need help....But I don't know where to find one....I've been asking myself... but like I said, I don't have the answer.... No one wants to answer this, or even bother to ask.... Its how it got exaggerated...

Figuring that people, don't actually care....really hurts....It only worsen things...

I only hope that time will the heal the wound...

Words

Words don't come easy to me......
How can I find a way?
To make you see this way...
Words don't come easy....

Untitled

Sleepy....ZzZzz

Nails in the Fence

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence.

Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all.

He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, 'You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one.

You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. But It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound will still be there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.

Remember that friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share words of praise and they always want to open their hearts to us.'

You Are My Friend and I'm Honoured

I'm sorry if I have ever left a 'hole' in your fence.....Please forgive me...

Why?? Here's the answer....

Never have I said the reasons why at certain times I would be poetic. Some people, disgusted by the way I wrote on my blog or anywhere in the cyberspace...

I have no power to change your perception nor control any of your feelings towards me. All I can do is to explain and it is up to you to decide.

Let me tell you a story about a boy, whose parents really wants him to do his best at his studies. However, he wasn't really into academic. All he wants to do is to play sports and have fun with his life. Living his life to the fullest. Day by day, months by months went by and he still didn't change despite the urge from his parents.

At one time, his result was so bad that he dropped to the second class. It was when everything started to seem so different. People don't look at him as usual anymore. He was treated the same like a school dropout. Embarassed and shamed, he was determine to change for the better. At that time, his friends all left him behind....

His new class was treating him the same also. He wasn't accepted in neither both class. He figured out that friends doesn't last long. A laughing friend can be found anywhere, anytime but a crying friend is so rare that only the lucky ones can have.

Pressure was pushing him to his limit until a point he broke down. He confessed to his mom and want to prove everyone wrong. He wants to slap everyone with his exam result slip....Being a good mom, she guides him to success, not by education but by motivation. That boy work really hard that year....and he finally got his results...Everyone was stunned and it was then he knew his true friends.

That little boy is me...

Some people can live on with their life but for me, ever since that chapter in my life, I have come to learn that certain friends that can be dumped into dustbin and never hear anything from them. I'm not saying everyone is bad in my previous school....I do have friends that stood up for me at that time.....

Friends can really do make impact in ones life....Do you know, when in times of trouble, why do you feel so lonely? Its because your friends are not there for you...I know, because I always feel the same. Ever since then, I have learn to differentiate my laughing friend and my crying friend.....When you realise about this, your world gonna be a lot smaller....Without noticing it, you feel lonely despite all the people around you.

I want to be there for people...I want to inspire them, I want to make them believe, I want them to feel that there are people that are still kind in this world.

I want to motivate them...

I merely want to help them to believe in themselves....Its what I've been sending this message to everyone...Believe.....That is the reason...That is the reason why I came to the hexagon and helped two person with their bio eventough tomorrow gonna have bio test and I haven't even started opening my books yet.....

Probably some notice it, but I don't really care...I just want to inspire people and it all begins with one random act of kindness at a time....

The "Warung" Girl

I met this girl back at school yesterday.....She was there eversince I was form 4... I do not know her name nor her age. She works there, a 'warung' beside my school. Everybody eats there after school because canteen would be closed. I've forgotten her after my SPM but just to see her yesterday reminds me of the days that I would go to the 'warung' and eat...

She's very cute and pretty...She looks like a school girl and still looks the same. I always wonder if she quit school to work....but I didn't dare to ask....I didn't even dare to ask her name....haha.

She's probably married but I'm not really sure. I don't know a thing about her actually.... I just recognize her cute face....

She probably the cutest girl I ever seen. She small-sized and have a very sweet voice....If she smiles, I could not help to smile to her back....She's a very good cook too.


It would be nice if I know something about her....Just her name would suffice...Unfortunately, it would only be in my dreams~~!

My Responsibility.....

I learned something....Yesterday I sat with my parents along with my little brother and we chat until 4 am.

We talked many stuffs.....Facts of life, our relatives, Business management ( I learn a lot in this one....Haha....Dad have a master degree on this ) . And One knowlegde that I think that is the most valuable that I learned that day was my family's history.

My dad and mum said that it is time that we know the history of our family. And so I listen eagerly. I never knew these stuffs, and perhaps they seen that it is time for me to learn from the family's history. They told me that I'm old and matured enough to learn and not to repeat the same mistake.

I was devastated just by listening to the hardship that they have to gone through together...Mum and Dad....Before and after their marriage. I was unable to even imagine.....myself surviving that hardship...I nearly cried, feeling that my parents actually have to go through that.....And I realise that, all this while I thought that the IB programme is tough and but theirs was a lot tougher... I shouldn't have complained, but instead be grateful. I realise this now.

My father was born to a family of a farmer.....He was the cycle breaker in his family....He managed to get himself out of poverty and carry out what his late father ( my grandfather ) asked him to do....take care of his brothers.

On that same night, my father entrusted me to do the same....I was deeply honoured.....I went to sleep that night with a big responsibility....And I asked myself...

Will I be able to do the same??

Only time will tell....Till then, life gotta to go on.....